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25 Insane Reasons Why Kids Don’t Like Certain Colleges

We got a good laugh from this post we saw on the Neurotic Parent blog:

While parents work the waitlists, high school seniors all over the country are agonizing about where to send in their deposits. Students dutifully go on tours at Admitted Student events in hopes of achieving the clarity they need to make lifechanging decisions. But instead of checking out the seminars taught by Nobel winners or evaluating the neuroscience research opportunities, they tend to focus on the prep/goth/nerd quotient or whether you can use your meal points to order a thin crust marguerita pizza.

Here are some of the ridiculous reasons that kids dismiss some excellent colleges:

1. Dislike of archways

2. No Chipotle within walking distance

3. “I don’t know anyone there.”

4. “I know too many people there.”

5. Aversion to tour guides’ footwear (five-toed multiport sneakers) or headwear (Sherpa cap)

6. Tour guide too smug (“In my spare time I’m a midwife, and since returning from Uganda, I’ve started an NGO that installs solar panels in orphanages.”)

7. Annoying bell tower

8. Too many Harry Potter references during info session

9. Not enough/too many vegan options in dining hall

10. Aversion to architecture: too Georgian, too Gothic, too Taco Bell

11. Too many mentions of how Oceanography course changed tour guide’s life

12. Tour guide’s resemblance to Justin Bieber

13. Too many homeless people

14. Professors look like homeless people

15. Aversion to upstate NY (“Upstate NY is for camp, not college”)

16. Tour guide’s repeated mention of a cappella groups and/or squirrel clubs

17. Rain

18. Woodland creatures: deer, raccoons, skunks

19. Aversion to school colors

20. Townies reminiscent of characters in DeliveranceBig Love, or Jersey Shore

21. Mean parking attendant

22. Long line for the ellipticals at the gym

23. Lame Latin words in school motto

24. Emma Watson transferred out

25. School is parents’ first choice

 

Source: The Neurotic Parent

 

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